Since it’s Valentine’s Day there’s no better day of the year to talk about one of the top 6 human needs ‘Love & Connection’.

For those of you who are not familiar with Anthony Robin’s Top 6 Human Needs, here is a quick run down.

1. Certainty

Which means we all like a bit of certainty, that we’re going to be safe, secure, have food on the table, a roof over our head and maybe knowing that our family is there for us when we get home, or always on the other end of a phone call. 

Too much certainty can however, be boring. When we know exactly what is going to happen next, maybe your life feels a bit like Groundhog Day… and we don’t want to know what happens at the end of a movie, we would like to enjoy the journey of the unknown.

Which brings me to the next one…

2. Uncertainty

Where we like variety, the need for adventure, new experiences, change and new stimuli which can make things exciting! 

Too much uncertainty can make people feel unstable and fearful, not knowing where the next pay cheque is coming in, whereas, others love the challenge.

3. Significance

We all like to feel important and valued. A feeling of significance can be the feeling that you’re special, in your relationship, team at work, that you’re needed and things wouldn’t be the same or would fall over without you. 

Too much importance on significance however leave some people always wanting to be in the lime light, coming across as more important than others, arrogant or swamped with people around them, because no one else is quite as good as they are!

4. Love & Connection

A strong feeling of closeness or a union with someone or something. This is definitely a top need of mine out of these top 6 human needs. I love the feeling of giving love, being love, speaking from my heart and feeling deeply connected to others. For me, nothing else beats it.  

How to get more love and connection? Read my tips below to get more Love & Connection on this Valentine’s Day.

5. Growth

This is my second top 6 human need, expanding upon your knowledge, capabilities and learning. I’m definitely a dedicated life long learner and without this in my day, my brain just doesn’t get the dose of endorphins it loves!

Too much growth, can leave you overwhelmed or give you growing pains, don’t grow too fast that you end up falling over.

6. Contribution

A sense of service and purpose, helping and supporting others. Of course I love this one too, and when I’m growing and coming from a place of love and connection, is when I feel I give back the most. The happier and more loving I am, the more I give and get back!

What top 2 needs are most important to you in your life?

Top Tips for generating more Love & Connection in your life:

• Open your heart and speak from a place of love, compassion and understanding. What most people really want deep down under everything else… is to be loved (stay tuned for my upcoming post and more on this) and typically people are always trying to do their best. Aren’t you? It might not be your very best that you’ve ever done, but given the situation, environment and what’s going on, you are doing your best, because, ya know, if you could do better, you would.
• Be fully present - it’s the best gift you can give to someone. Throw multi-tasking or multi-thinking out the window! Make the person you’re with feel like they are the most important person in your world right now. And if they’re not and you don’t want to be talking to them, that will come across in your energy so you may as well quickly take your presence elsewhere…
• Really look at the person - I like to say, ‘see straight through them’ it can be eerie in one way but quite amazing to feel it from someone else at the same time. Like they really know you, they see through the barriers, the persona you put on and can feel your true and pure essence and love you all the more for it. To do this for others, start with being inquisitive, seek to learn about them, and not jump to judge or want them to be just like you. Be curious to their points of view, experiences in the world and unique selves, ask more questions and really listen. You never know, you just might learn something and that will help fill up your Growth Human Need.
• TIP - To really see and know someone straight away helps when you really know yourself. If you’re great at self awareness and dedicated to self mastery, you’ll be great at this. 
• Be vulnerable and your real self - if you have barriers up, if you’re trying to be someone you’re not, if you’re trying to be the person you think the other person wants you to be, will like or you will impress, you’re not connected. There will be a wall.
• Which brings me to Speak Your Truth - when you do this, it’s refreshing, the other person can tell and the best thing about this is it gives permission for the other person to do the same. Of course there is a way to do this that leaves both you and them feeling good. (more on communication strategies for truthful conversations coming here soon). If you open up and share who you are, it can give a sense of safety that the other person can too and then guess what – you’re connected on a whole new realm. 
• Take your walls down, stop being scared of what others might think, and BE YOURSELF.

I hope you enjoyed learning about the Top 6 Human Needs and that my tips help you generate more love and connection in your life.

If you need help getting deeply connected with others in your life, book yourself a free strategy session with me today where I’ll show you how.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Until then, Happy Valentine’s Day!
Live your best life!

Jacqueline Pigdon BSc, The LOVE MONDAYS Expert, is an Australian rowing champion, Wealth Dynamics, Talent Dynamics and Health Dynamics Performance Consultant, a spiritual life, career and business coach, speaker, author and award-winning entrepreneur!

M: +61 (0) 447728677

E: [email protected] 

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